My tumblr is a place for me to get thoughts out of my head in a form where people can read. Not as many people come here as they do other places I can write a blog and I like that. Why not make it private? Well I don’t want to because maybe something I write could be helpful to someone else.
What to write today, well today was a busy day. I’m really exhausted from tour (with a cold) and the other health issues I am having.
But my real reason to come here and write is because my Great Uncle Don (my Grandmas, sisters husband) passed away late this afternoon after a long decline in health after a bad stroke a little under a year ago.
It was something that was coming and I knew that and its upsetting but the part that upsets me more is what I think about when it comes to my Great Aunt Linda and My Grandmother. They are sisters that grew up together in Germany with 7 other brothers and sisters. They lived through world wars and the Holocaust. Grandma met my Grandpa while he was stationed in Germany during his service in the United States Army. If you’ve been here before you know how they met and married and how my Grandma came to America on a boat into New York Harbor. Once my Grandma and Grandpa saved up enough money, they sent it to Germany so Grandma’s sister Linda could come to America (a land of hope, opportunity and freedom) Linda came here and met another gentleman in the Armed Forces a man by the name of Donald Manus. They fell in love and married. My Grandma & Grandpa, and my Great Aunt Linda & Uncle Don started their new families here in America. There are brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts, moms, dads, cousins and all kinds of family on both sides. So many of us in fact that in 1994 all 52 of us (in America) flew to Germany for my Great Grandmother and Great Grandfathers 60th wedding anniversary. Our 52 + their 56 made for one memorable family gathering. Needless to say our Families were at one point huge, but as time goes on our families become smaller. A few days after that trip to Germany when my Mom, Uncle Mike, Sister and I got back from Germany (we came back a week earlier than the rest) and after my Great Grandfather got to see all the kids, and grandkids and great grandkids at his bedside (he was battling cancer) he passed on, he held on to see all the family that he created and long enough to have 60 amazing years with my Great Grandmother. Since then illness, and father time himself have slowly made our family smaller. Almost two years ago it finally came close to home when my Grandpa lost his battle with cancer way too early. Grandmas best friend and soul mate was gone, my dad was gone. Now my Great Uncle has passed, and the two sisters that came to America for Love, and a chance at a great life have both lost their greatest reasons of all.
The reason I write this is because I can’t imagine what that feels like. I just talked to my Grandma and Aunt Linda and both sounded equally upset. Aunt Linda because of what she knew that was coming has arrived and my Grandma because this tragic event has without a doubt brought back all those memories of losing her Love so quickly and unfairly.
Now these two sisters who were foreigners to this land probably both feel foreign and lost. Yes they have kids and grandkids but even with all those people and all that love nothing can replace what they have lost, and there is no way to measure the greatness of that loss. I for one cant imagine, and once again I’m wishing that I knew of a way to make them both feel okay. No I’m not as close with my Great Aunt as my Grandma but I can definitely feel the pain and with how my Grandma sounded on the phone, that pain and loss is immense.
